How to survive renovation: Top tips…, Latest News

Home renovations are a challenging experience. There is no shortage of decisions to make, from the colour of wall paint to the choice of cabinetry hardware – not to mention myriad contractors to deal with.

The scenario becomes even more fraught for married couples.

A survey conducted by United States-based interior design platform Houzz in 2018 reported that a third of its 1,300 respondents found the renovation process with their significant other “frustrating”.

It was even more extreme for 7 per cent of the respondents, who said they considered separation or divorce during the process.

Yet, more than half of those surveyed considered the experience to be collaborative, fulfilling or both.

So, what is the secret to surviving a renovation without entertaining thoughts of divorce?

Hepmil Media Group co-founder and chief creative officer Adrian Ang – also known as SGAG’s Xiao Ming on social media – and his wife Goh Xin Lei might have some idea.

After all, the couple have survived three major renovation projects in three homes, two of which occurred in the last four years.

They did some minor works in their first home, an executive condominium unit in Tampines, in 2016.

The renovation for their second home – a three-bedroom, 1,087 sq ft condominium unit in East Coast – began in mid-2021 and was completed half a year later.

The most recent project for their third home had a much tighter timeline – just eight weeks, excluding two weeks of intensive designing and planning, from mid-November 2024 to early January 2025.

“We love to torture ourselves,” quips Mr Ang, 38. “But the truth is, we found out we were expecting a second child in mid-2024 and quickly realised we would need a much bigger space.”

The couple began the house-hunting process with one key criterion: The new space should be ready for them to move into. They found a four-bedroom, 1,378 sq ft resale condominium, also in the east, and swiftly signed on the dotted line.

“We could have just gone in, put in our own things and settled for the state we bought it in,” says Ms Goh, who is also 38 and an executive manager at a global professional services firm.

Some might figure that this was the wiser course of action, given the tight schedule.

“But we realised that if we didn’t want to outgrow our new home sooner than later, and if we wanted it to be a place we could call our own, we would need to invest the time, money and effort in doing it up according to our taste,” she adds.

And the couple succeeded. They moved into their new home just before Chinese New Year in late January with their nearly-three-year-old son Zachary – less than a month before Ms Goh gave birth to their daughter Natalie in February, as planned.

The couple reveal how their marriage survived the renovations unscathed – and emerged even stronger than before.

1. Hire the right people

As Mr Ang points out, renovating a home is most likely a couple’s first big project together.

“Most of us have our individual day jobs and just come home to each other at night. I suppose a wedding is the closest other thing to a big couple project,” he says.

“But your home is a place you’ll have to live with every day. So, having a designer who understands your individual personalities and styles, and works with you to merge them both, makes all the difference.”

Mr Ang leans towards a clean Nordic aesthetic, while Ms Goh prefers a modern contemporary vibe.

Left to themselves, they would probably have ended up with a Frankenstein’s monster of a home. Fortunately, their designer was able to direct the conversation towards harmonising colours and textures that satisfied both husband and wife.

“If we could not reach a consensus on a paint colour, our designer was perceptive and sensitive enough to say, ‘Hey, let’s sit on this and revisit it another time.’ Which gave us time to think and come back to the topic with a more level head,” says Ms Goh.

2. Plan and align on a design vision

Ms Goh and Mr Ang’s experience with their second home demonstrated the importance of front-loading the design and planning process, given their different design perspectives.

“We started our Pinterest mood board early, to make sure that we were aligned on the stylistic vision before we started the design process,” says Ms Goh.

Ms Goh led the charge in populating the mood board, frequently checking in with her husband to gauge what he liked and disliked.

“We ended up converging a bit more in our styles this time. At the same time, we were both ready to be more experimental,” she adds.

Having grown as a couple over the years, they have also developed a greater understanding of each other’s strengths and interests.

“Xin Lei knows my preferences better this time around, so I could rely on her to reflect both of us in her vision of our new home,” says Mr Ang.

3. Divide and conquer

Mr Ang took point during the renovation process, which started in mid-November – just a few months before Ms Goh’s February due date.

“I was very proactive in visiting the site frequently to check on the progress, which meant I was able to identify and resolve problems as soon as they popped up, rather than later on during the handover process,” he says.

This division of roles – and their mutual trust that each would act in their best interest as a couple and a family – also helped them get through the renovation process without burning out, they say.

“For our first renovation, we may have felt that getting involved in every decision was our way of building our nest together,” says Mr Ang.

4. Remember the end goal

The joint objective of building a home that their growing family could enjoy and love for years had to be kept front and centre, say the couple.

This meant accepting and acknowledging that conflicts and obstacles are inevitable, even with a surfeit of planning.

“We had to go in with this mentality that nothing is going to be perfect, despite our best efforts,” says Ms Goh.

With the third and latest renovation, a new issue would pop up every day, says Ms Goh. For instance, they had to alter a lighting plan because of a door’s position.

“But I knew and trusted that Adrian was keeping an eye on the worksite, and I trusted that Berinda, our contractors and vendors had our best interests at heart and were working tirelessly to make this work for us. So, there was no place for finger-pointing. It was more about, how can we solve this together?”

After all, adds Mr Ang: “We’re not here because we want to hurt each other, but because we want to work towards something that is positive and built on love.”